Tag Archives: love

Fade.

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All the lies,
Empty eyes,
Bitterness evolves,
love dissolves,
Trust is dying,
Senseless trying.

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My oil field man.

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My oil field man.

It’s a way of life in Newfoundland,
Deer lake airport has become his second home throughout the years,
My selfless husband devotes his time, sweat, blood and tears,
Ultimately sacrificing his life to a seismic crew and the Oilsands of the Mainland,

He works holidays, birthdays, Christmas day, fathers day and more,
He works everyday, from sun up to sun down,
Spending months in a work camp without seeing a town,
Spending months working, until his body is tired, worn and sore,

He has endured tornadoes in the blistering desert heats of Oman,
Endured the extreme colds of Alberta and Alaska which left frostbite on his fingers and arms,
His days tattoo his skin and his heart with scars,
Yet, my oil field man stands strong and treks on,

He has climbed sand dunes and rugged terrains,
While praying vipers, scorpions, wolves, cougars and bears, wouldn’t see him there,
Throughout it all never thinking life is unfair,
Throughout it all my oil field man never complains,

Because, although he has given the oilfield his time and most of his life,
Although seismic has borrowed his body and mind,
Every time he leaves, his heart is left behind,
Every time he leaves his remaining part is kept safely until his return, by his children and his wife.

I saw a unicorn.

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I saw a unicorn.

Today I had a beautiful moment, one of those shooting star kind of moments on the roller coaster of parental emotions. It only comes around once In awhile, you don’t know when it’s coming back, but when you experience it, it makes everything worth while. It’s the holy grail kind of moment that your mind will take you back to, when your kid drew on the couch, cut their own hair, clogged the toilet AGAIN! Hit their sister and took a tantrum in the store, when the whining, the tantrums and the fighting seem all too much to bare, your mind will take you there, to that one time, that shooting star moment, the moment your child filled your heart with goosebumps and brought tears to your eyes, the moment you overflowed with pride, and you couldn’t contain your tears, even though everyone was there and it was just a soccer match, or swimming lesson, the first day of school, or just another day at home. This little gem could pop up any day, anywhere, and it will keep you going, it’s that kind of moment In its exquisite glory, that I witnessed this morning!

As I began my morning routine at 6am, I went downstairs to shower, to get to the washroom I pass the two older children’s rooms on the way. I usually look in on them to make sure they are still asleep. This morning I looked in Matthew’s room and instead of one curly haired head of orange peeking out from the covers there were two! I had to take a second look, I thought my tired eyes may have been deceiving me. I went in the room to investigate. As I stood next to Matthew’s bed in awe of the strange phenomena that blessed my eyes, Matthew awoke “oh hi, mom, Maya had a bad dream, I think about dinosaurs or something, I heard her crying so I told her to come in my bed” and with that my heart exploded a million tiny electric surges, that filled my entire body with what I can only describe as the fuel that keeps me going day to day. These shooting stars in the realm of complex parental emotion will keep you coming back for more like a drug, but unlike a drug the only side effect is euphoria and love.

I spend most my days deep within this realm reminiscing about the unicorns that graciously, looked my way. Whether or not this phenomena is natures way of providing the brain the nourishment it needs to sustain itself and endure the extreme up and downs of parental emotion, it is a dazzling place to be. So I will trek on in this parenting endeavour knowing that I have plenty of fuel to drive me.

“The last nerve”

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“The last nerve”

Today has been one of those days you know? one of those days you find yourself uttering the words “your getting on my last nerve” more often then you would care to admit, I don’t know why I think those words hold any weight in the minds of my kids, it’s not like the “last nerve” is some critical component of my genetic make-up and without it there would be an inevitable “jenga effect” resulting in my spontaneous combustion…. one of those days you fantasize about running away but can’t even run away in your own head without hearing the six year old and the seven year old fighting about if the blanket smells like “Nanny’s” or if it smells like “soap” Or the two year insisting her point that “scary cows” DO live in the house next door and say “moooooo” to her as she walks by, the dog chewing on your pants and the cartoons blaring at absurdly loud volumes, The dirty laundry basket is about to erupt, the mess being made while you peel potatoes and carrots for supper is going to take ANOTHER hour to clean, now the dog is whining at the door, and you trip over the 2 year who was rolling around the floor!

One of THOSE days the “last nerve” quote on repeat kind of days. So after countless failed attempts to control this feels like an eternity kind of day, I’m going to have to surrender to it, close the curtains and take off my glasses so I can’t see the mess, and snuggle with these little people until they seem less like evil demons sent to drive me crazy and more like the beautiful children that bring tears to my eyes and fill me with pride, the children I love.

Halloween!

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Halloween!

Halloween for the kids brings with it the whirlwind of excitement that accompanies copious amounts of sugar, dressing up as their favourite character, and a free pass to roam the streets at night screaming and telling people to smell their feet! Our day started off as a “normal” day, Maci (the two year old) woke me at 6am to complain about Jenny (the 6 month old german shepherd) snoring too loud. Since my husband (Paul) left for ALaska 4 weeks ago Maci has been sleeping in my bed instead of her own (which is in my room next to my bed.) and Jenny has been sleeping in Maci’s bed (snoring loudly!). Anyways.. we got up at 6am, got Matthew (the seven year old) and Maya (the six year old) breakfast and brought them to school. On the way to school myself and Maya had a conversation about why it’s not appropriate to say “trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat, if you don’t, I don’t care I’ll pull down your underwear.” after some huffing and puffing she agreed to remove “I don’t care, I’ll pull down your underwear” from the equation.

So we got the kids off to school, returned home did some random everyday things, cleaned, got lunch, snacks, rode around the house on a pretend horse, had coffee with a friend, was asked to give Maci a hug while she used potty (which happens way to often!). Watched Frozen for the 9,678,456,783’Th time, broke up a few fights between Maci and Jenny, and got the treats and costumes all ready for when the kids got home from school.

When the kids got home I figured we would have an early 4pm supper so they could get ready and get to the trick-or-treating, I’m not sure why I even made supper because apparently chocolate and chips and whatever else made it into their all-the-candy-you-can-shove-in-your-mouth-A-THON left no room for salmon and carrots! But it’s one day, they can have their one day of sugar, tomorrow it’s back to salmon!

Now Maleficent, Olaf and Minecraft Steve were ready to hit the streets! Matthew and Maya kept leaving their sister behind, and got into a fight while knocking on a door, Maya blurted out the “underwear thing” a couple times, Maci was jumping up and down saying “I love candy!”, But they did say thank-you to everyone, no one got seriously hurt other then a few tumbles for Maci, and everyone came home happy!