The hug, guest starring “discipline.”

Standard
The hug, guest starring “discipline.”

A hug,
Can calm your crying,
Soothe a child sobbing,
Have you forget the horrible thing,
That has you thinking,
You are dying,
Wonderful things a bug can bring,
When problems are multiplying,
When the world seems trying,
Having arms intertwining,
May have you finding,
Your worries are unwinding,
Oh, There is no denying,
The power of a hug,

BUT!

What if…

A hug,
Was used more sinisterly,
Dastardly,
Slightly, haphazardly,
Ratherly ingeniously,
Honestly, slightly manipulatively,
Hugging administered effectively,
Can end sibling rivalry,
Siblings hugging forcibly,
Enforcing, them coercively,
While harvesting undeniably,
The power of a hug!

A hug
Can halt siblings crying,
Hitting, kicking, and sobbing,
When punishing doesn’t solve a thing,
You may start thinking,
Forcing Sibling hugging can seem worse then dying,
Wonderful things a hug can bring,
When the fights are multiplying,
How about trying,
Having their arms intertwining,
You may start finding,
The fighting is unwinding,
Oh, there is no denying,
the power of a hug!

My oil field man.

Standard
My oil field man.

It’s a way of life in Newfoundland,
Deer lake airport has become his second home throughout the years,
My selfless husband devotes his time, sweat, blood and tears,
Ultimately sacrificing his life to a seismic crew and the Oilsands of the Mainland,

He works holidays, birthdays, Christmas day, fathers day and more,
He works everyday, from sun up to sun down,
Spending months in a work camp without seeing a town,
Spending months working, until his body is tired, worn and sore,

He has endured tornadoes in the blistering desert heats of Oman,
Endured the extreme colds of Alberta and Alaska which left frostbite on his fingers and arms,
His days tattoo his skin and his heart with scars,
Yet, my oil field man stands strong and treks on,

He has climbed sand dunes and rugged terrains,
While praying vipers, scorpions, wolves, cougars and bears, wouldn’t see him there,
Throughout it all never thinking life is unfair,
Throughout it all my oil field man never complains,

Because, although he has given the oilfield his time and most of his life,
Although seismic has borrowed his body and mind,
Every time he leaves, his heart is left behind,
Every time he leaves his remaining part is kept safely until his return, by his children and his wife.

My medical mystery.

Standard
My medical mystery.

I’ve concluded lately that I must be suffering from a physical or mental ailment. I have been having peculiar, unexplained symptoms. They include, hallucinations, an inability to properly string together sentences coherently, and I have been hearing voices!

I noticed the first symptom one day when I asked my children if their rooms were clean. To which they unanimously, with an eye roll each, and a quick snicker to one another, replied,

“YES, of course, mom!” .

Something about the way they snickered led me to believe they may not be practising honesty. I decided to go investigate for myself and low and behold my eyes conjured up an unholy mess that according to my children, “wasn’t even there.” I sighed and in an attempt to gain sympathy from my husband I exclaimed,

“Would you look at this mess!”

My husband at the time, was playing clash of titans on his phone and in the middle of an intense war or maybe planting crops (I can never figure out which one.) The game obviously needed his complete and undivided attention. He seemed annoyed by my question. I remember thinking at the time that he might have been planting imaginary vegetable crops to feed his very real family, because he had been using all our very real money to buy his imaginary beloved bags of gems. I can only assume he has the uncanny ability to see through the top of his head, and being enthralled with his game (planting crops or fighting kings) he used this extraordinary ability, because without even looking up, he quickly replied,

“I don’t see a mess.”

At this point I was feeling rather defeated but I decided to give it one more try. I proceeded to ask my children,

“Why are your rooms a mess, after I explicitly asked you to clean them?”

They shrugged their shoulders, looked at one another grinning conspicuously and said,

“They aren’t.”

That’s when I came to the conclusion I must be suffering from hallucinations.

I noticed my inability to string together coherent sentences after days, weeks and months of my children and my husband not seeming to understand what I was saying to them. I would say to my children,

“Go brush your teeth.”

and in my incoherent babbling they would hear,

“Go play xbox.”

or

“Go flick your toothbrush with water, place it in your mouth for three seconds, pretend you brushed your teeth, and then when I tell you to brush them again, whine and stomp your feet!”

My suspicions were even further confirmed when my husband began to misconstrue what I was saying to him. I would ask,

“Can you please take out the garbage?”

I would ask him this, the night before garbage day in an attempt to avoid him in the morning, inevitably running outside in his boxers for all the neighbours to see! Nonetheless my incoherent babbling got the better of me and had him hearing,

“Please ignore me, don’t take out the garbage tonight, wait until you hear the garbage truck coming down the road, Leap out of bed, spew random profanities, mutter that I should have told you garbage day was coming and proceed to take the garbage outside in your boxers!”

As you can see, I’m suffering from some very serious symptoms, and those aren’t even the most alarming. I have been hearing voices as well! Last week I thought I heard my children downstairs fighting and I “thought” they were calling each other names. To my surprise when I questioned them no one had any idea what I was talking about! There was also an incident with my husband. I was complaining about the children as I usually do and I distinctly heard him mutter,

“For the love of god, would you shut up already!”

I glared at him intensely, with my hands on my hips, ready to let off the fully loaded cockpit of arguments that I had been waiting to unleash on him for months, as I sternly demanded,

“Why would you say something like that to me?”

He looked puzzled for a second, as if I had heard something I wasn’t supposed to hear, after a few seconds the seemingly distressed look on his face had disappeared and he simply replied,

“What’s that darling? I didn’t say anything!”

I am becoming so worried about all these bizarre symptoms, a trip to doctor will soon be in order. If not, I may start to hallucinate that I am on a secluded island, sipping daiquiris, watching nearby dolphins playing angelically. Running sand between my toes, while the warm sun beams on my face and I fan myself with a paper that appears to read “divorce agreement,” or I may just start to hallucinate that my children are sobbing uncontrollably, clinging to the suitcases that they hold in each hand, behind domineering black iron gates, simultaneously crying,

“Please, don’t send us to military school!”

The morning time trap.

Standard
The morning time trap.

Why do mornings seem to defy the logics of time? In the morning it seems like all things tangible and intangible are set to “slow motion” even the kettle takes longer to boil. I have a bit of a control issue, so I like to think that I can do things or not do things to take control of a situation. So I try and be as prepared as I can be for the morning routine with the kids. I pour their cereal into their bowls with a paper towel over the top, and cut up some fruit the night before. I place their clothes in their rooms, and place mine in the washroom. Maya’s hair buckles and earrings are placed by her place-mat, and the kids lunch bags are in the fridge ready to go. I even put sugar and coffee in my mug and place it by the kettle. I do all this because if done at 6:30PM it takes three minutes whereas, if done at 6:30AM it takes twenty-three minutes, and opens the floodgates to the lurking reservoir of chaos, that will strategically place dominos throughout my day, destined to topple one at a time quickly gaining momentum, and precedence as each chaotic episode fuels the next. Which, will undoubtedly start with me leaving the house with my shirt on inside out, and backwards, the two year old will still be in pyjamas, the older children will forget their lunches, the dog will miss her morning walk and I won’t have time to drink my coffee (you don’t want to know what’s lurking in the “mommy had no coffee” reservoir.) So being prepared is my only defence against the impending chaos that looms around the corner which results from this slow motion time lapse we experience each morning.

I don’t know if everyone’s mornings share this strange phenomena. Maybe it’s just my house that is seemingly afflicted with a riff in the time continuum that only takes place in the early morning hours. For today though, the riff has been eluded, the metaphorical floodgates have been shut, and the chaos has been kept away. Which in turn allowed us to take a non-metaphorical walk chaos-free down by real flood gates, while taking advantage of this captivating November day!

Goodbye Halloween candy.

Standard
Goodbye Halloween candy.

It’s hasn’t been a week since Halloween and the three pillow cases of candy have seriously diminished in size. Looking at those half empty bags really highlights my need to start eating healthy again. I’ve gained five pounds and the kids are just not accepting that a candy fairy snuck in throughout the night and could only use candy to build her tiny little fairy town, for her tiny little fairy babies. Times like these I wish I wasn’t raising them to think before they believe everything. Last year I was on a health kick, exercising, eating quinoa, drinking ungodly amounts of water and smoothies everyday, you know all that healthy stuff you’re supposed to do. I’ve since fallen into this unhealthy eating cycle, again. I can feel it taking a toll on my body, I feel generally sick all the time, I don’t have energy, my skin is bad, and I don’t sleep well. Of course, that last one could be due to the two year old who decides half way through the night she’s going to sleep crossways in the bed and kick mommy in the face, and ask for her “sucky” twenty times a night, because it fell out of her mouth while she was busy kicking mommy in the face… I mean sleeping, or the fact she wakes up screaming saying Matthew punched her, Jenny bit her or Maya pulled her hair (They even fight in their dreams). It could very well be an effect of any one of those scenarios, but for now I’ll chalk it up to my unhealthy eating habits.

My husband isn’t going to like the comeback of quinoa flax muffins. (Which he lovingly renamed “shit tarts”) and the kids aren’t going to be happy about the replacement of Their beloved Greco pizza with cauliflower pizza, but those half eaten bags of Halloween guilt are not going to justify themselves, the sugar highs are getting out of control, and these extra pounds aren’t going to evaporate. So goodbye Halloween candy it was good while it lasted but you just can’t stay here.

I saw a unicorn.

Standard
I saw a unicorn.

Today I had a beautiful moment, one of those shooting star kind of moments on the roller coaster of parental emotions. It only comes around once In awhile, you don’t know when it’s coming back, but when you experience it, it makes everything worth while. It’s the holy grail kind of moment that your mind will take you back to, when your kid drew on the couch, cut their own hair, clogged the toilet AGAIN! Hit their sister and took a tantrum in the store, when the whining, the tantrums and the fighting seem all too much to bare, your mind will take you there, to that one time, that shooting star moment, the moment your child filled your heart with goosebumps and brought tears to your eyes, the moment you overflowed with pride, and you couldn’t contain your tears, even though everyone was there and it was just a soccer match, or swimming lesson, the first day of school, or just another day at home. This little gem could pop up any day, anywhere, and it will keep you going, it’s that kind of moment In its exquisite glory, that I witnessed this morning!

As I began my morning routine at 6am, I went downstairs to shower, to get to the washroom I pass the two older children’s rooms on the way. I usually look in on them to make sure they are still asleep. This morning I looked in Matthew’s room and instead of one curly haired head of orange peeking out from the covers there were two! I had to take a second look, I thought my tired eyes may have been deceiving me. I went in the room to investigate. As I stood next to Matthew’s bed in awe of the strange phenomena that blessed my eyes, Matthew awoke “oh hi, mom, Maya had a bad dream, I think about dinosaurs or something, I heard her crying so I told her to come in my bed” and with that my heart exploded a million tiny electric surges, that filled my entire body with what I can only describe as the fuel that keeps me going day to day. These shooting stars in the realm of complex parental emotion will keep you coming back for more like a drug, but unlike a drug the only side effect is euphoria and love.

I spend most my days deep within this realm reminiscing about the unicorns that graciously, looked my way. Whether or not this phenomena is natures way of providing the brain the nourishment it needs to sustain itself and endure the extreme up and downs of parental emotion, it is a dazzling place to be. So I will trek on in this parenting endeavour knowing that I have plenty of fuel to drive me.

10 random things I’ve learned as a SAHM.

Standard
10 random things I’ve learned as a SAHM.

1. I’ve learned to Give affection freely and often.

2. I’ve learned It IS ok to eat jam sandwiches for lunch everyday for a week straight, the kids are eating and I switched it up with bagels on Wednesday!

3. I’ve learned that you should do what’s right for your family don’t assume anyone else knows what’s best for you because no one else has parenting figured out either! Every family is unique so what works for one may not work for all.

4. I’ve learned not to compare my children to others, every child is different.

5. I’ve learned If they tell you they won’t make a mess, they will make a mess.

6. I’ve learned to Admit when I’m wrong, and apologize.

7. I’ve learned Getting up before the kids to shower and having clothes, school lunches and breakfast ready (usually just cereal and some fruit cut up.) for everyone the night before makes life a lot easier!

8. I’ve learned Going to bed before 10pm makes getting up before everyone a lot easier!

9. I’ve learned to Get groceries and run errands in the early morning after bringing the older kids to school while Stores are easier to navigate with a 2 year old because no one else is shopping.

10. I’ve learned You will have moments of utter defeat and feel like you can’t go on, but those moments will quickly dissipate when you watch those angels sleep, which will give you the fuel you need to weather the storm all over again tomorrow.